Saturday, May 31, 2008

Tops or Bottoms?

What percentage of gay men are tops and what percentage are bottoms? Anon.

I have never, ahem, actually done a scientific survey on this subject, but I would say it's about evenly divided. Of course there are men who are versatile, both top and bottom, but judging from what I see on gay dating/sex/friendship sites, there don't seem to be as many of them.

I can tell you that in my experience you can't assume the butcher gay men are automatically tops and the "femmes" are bottoms, because sometimes the reverse is true. When two men get together, it's two men getting together -- neither one is the "lady." Men who are bottoms should never feel that they are somehow less male because of it. There are some men who think of themselves as being "straight" because they are always the top when they have sex with another guy -- they're fooling themselves.

And, as usual, I remind everyone to stick to safe sex. This is true even if you are a top. Although there have been fewer cases of HIV infection in men who are tops than bottoms, it does happen. When it comes to anal penetration, always wear a condom.


Queers United said...

People often think that giving or receiving oral they cannot get HIV. One can get it from giving or receiving oral sex.

Bill Samuels said...

Yes, while it happens less often there have been cases of HIV infection through oral sex. Thanks for your comment.

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