Dr Bill, what do you think of this? Maybe it will give you a laugh. I was cruising a guy one night when he turns to me and says "I love your beard but you shouldn't dye it." Dr Bill -- I don't dye my beard! PH
Oops! Maybe he was just hoping you were older than he was! Did he have gray in his own beard? Or maybe he was just telling you that if it got to the point where you wanted to dye it, you should keep it natural. Whatever the case, I have to tell you that if anybody ever asked me if I dyed my goatee I'd probably just say:
"Yes -- Every St. Patty's Day I dye it green!"
You can steal the line if you want. Feel free to try variations such as "Halloween" and "orange" and "Ground hog's Day" and "blue."
I think you get the idea.