I noticed that gay bears like anal sex just like other gays. Usually
stockier (includes bodybuilders) men eat what I call a "rough diet" from
what I understand. So with that in mind, how do bear bottoms "clean"
themselves? How are their douching and eating techniques good enough to
possibly enjoy anal sex? One time when I wasn't 100% clean, the doors
wouldn't even open. Thank you for answering my dated, oblivious [?] question.
Okayyyy ... well this is probably a dated and obvious -- or even oblivious -- answer, but I assume bears take thorough showers like everyone else. Even men with hair both outside and inside their ass can do a good job of cleaning themselves with plenty of soap and a strong stream of water. In between showers things are a bit more problematic, but if you're going to take someone home with you and think there may be a problem, you can suggest you both shower both before sex and after. If you're referring to what your penis might encounter on its way up a rectum, well -- again, that's what condoms and showers [not golden showers, which is something else] are for. If a "rough diet" includes roughage you might not encounter, shall we say, too much of a bad thing when you're pumping away. It's very rare when you fuck a guy not to occasionally get some, well, crud on your dick [or condom]; sorry.
Showing posts with label safe sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label safe sex. Show all posts
Monday, June 24, 2013
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
The Big Kiss-Off?
All my boyfriend ever wants to do is smooch, smooch,smooch, but when I try to do something a little bit sexier, y'know fellatio, analism, he backs off. We get naked, and we make out -- and that's it! He seems very, very attracted to me as I am to him, but I can't figure out why he doesn't want to have sex. When I put it to him he just says, "I really like kissing." Forget about a blow job, he won't even touch my dick. I just can't figure out what's going on? Am I with the wrong guy?
Don't jump to conclusions. There are people who prefer kissing over everything else, but I'd be willing to bet that this guy simply wants to stick to very safe sex. However, the fact that he won't even indulge in mutual masturbation -- totally safe -- is a little odd. It may be that he has an abnormal fear of AIDS [safe -- or at least safer -- sex can include other things besides kissing], or perhaps he's HIV positive and can't bring himself to tell you. [For the record it's very unlikely that HIV can be spread via kissing unless both parties have bleeding gums. Even then it's not a given, just a possibility. Contact GMHC -- Gay Men's Health Crisis -- if you have more questions.]
I suggest you sit down and put the question to him, no matter how awkward it may be. Even if he is HIV positive, you can still enjoy safe sex with one another.
But remember, some people are really into kissing. Enjoy!
Don't jump to conclusions. There are people who prefer kissing over everything else, but I'd be willing to bet that this guy simply wants to stick to very safe sex. However, the fact that he won't even indulge in mutual masturbation -- totally safe -- is a little odd. It may be that he has an abnormal fear of AIDS [safe -- or at least safer -- sex can include other things besides kissing], or perhaps he's HIV positive and can't bring himself to tell you. [For the record it's very unlikely that HIV can be spread via kissing unless both parties have bleeding gums. Even then it's not a given, just a possibility. Contact GMHC -- Gay Men's Health Crisis -- if you have more questions.]
I suggest you sit down and put the question to him, no matter how awkward it may be. Even if he is HIV positive, you can still enjoy safe sex with one another.
But remember, some people are really into kissing. Enjoy!
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Tops and Condoms
Do "tops" have to wear condoms? Anon.
Yes. Bare-backing is not a good idea either for tops or bottoms. Although it certainly does not occur as often, there have definitely been cases of a top contracting HIV from a bottom partner.
In other words, use condoms whether you're a top, a bottom, or versatile.
Stay safe and have a great time!
Yes. Bare-backing is not a good idea either for tops or bottoms. Although it certainly does not occur as often, there have definitely been cases of a top contracting HIV from a bottom partner.
In other words, use condoms whether you're a top, a bottom, or versatile.
Stay safe and have a great time!
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Bare-Backing Lover
My lover and I have an open relationship but recently I learned to my GREAT distress that he has been bare-backing -- and he's a bottom. He doesn't seem to be possessed of the self-hatred that you've mentioned, but when it's so easy to have your sex partner slip on a condom ... I just can't understand his behavior. What can I do about this? Anon.
Frankly, I can't understand his behavior either. [For the record, bare-backing is engaging in anal sex without using a condom.] I know some tops complain that they don't like to wear condoms, that it interferes with the sensations that they feel [although in that case I would recommend experimenting with different types of condoms, and there are plenty] but it shouldn't make that much difference to a bottom (and again bottoms can also experiment with different types of condoms). Let me make it clear that unprotected anal sex is the absolutely riskiest behavior for gay men. While it is much, much riskier for bottoms, there have been documented cases of tops getting HIV because they didn't use a condom as well.
As for your lover's behavior, there are several explanations [besides the fact that he's being very stupid]. If he's very young, he may feel he's invincible and that bad things only happen to other people -- even though, to everyone else, he is "other people." It's possible his "extra-marital" relationships occur when he's under the influence of something, and he's careless. People who are sexually active should carry condoms at all times and be prepared for every circumstance. If your sex partner says he doesn't have a condom, pull one out of your pocket -- pronto. If he doesn't want to use it, say good-night -- no matter how hot he is. Some sexual experiences just aren't worth the danger.
HIV may not be the death sentence that it once was, but people should by no means take it casually. AIDS is still a serious medical condition that can impact a person's entire life. Simply being HIV positive, while nothing to despair over necessarily, can have a serious effect on a person's general health and social status. Too many people, of all races, genders and orientations, mistakenly believe that HIV/AIDS is "no big deal." You have to make sure that your lover is made aware of this by showing him this and other posts on the subject, nagging him until it finally sinks in. Not only is he risking his own health, but yours as well.
You and your partner need to get tested for HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. Again, being HIV positive, even having AIDS, is not the end of the world, as there are treatments that can help patients lead a more or less normal life [although it must be said that not everyone responds to treatment, which is another reason to swear off bare-backing]. But the fact that AIDS may be more treatable than it once was, does not mean that it's nothing to worry about. And other STDs are on the rise.
As for self-hatred, I've no doubt that some people who indulge in risky behavior have serious emotional issues, but in your lover's case it may simply be carefree, foolish recklessness on his part. If drugs or alcohol are influencing his behavior, then those issues must be addressed as well. [Don't get so drunk or fucked up that you can't wear a condom or remember to insist that your sex partner put one on.]
I'm in favor of open relationships. But for them to work, both partners have to be responsible. Which means safe sex at all times -- no exceptions!
Nag your lover about this until it sinks in.
Frankly, I can't understand his behavior either. [For the record, bare-backing is engaging in anal sex without using a condom.] I know some tops complain that they don't like to wear condoms, that it interferes with the sensations that they feel [although in that case I would recommend experimenting with different types of condoms, and there are plenty] but it shouldn't make that much difference to a bottom (and again bottoms can also experiment with different types of condoms). Let me make it clear that unprotected anal sex is the absolutely riskiest behavior for gay men. While it is much, much riskier for bottoms, there have been documented cases of tops getting HIV because they didn't use a condom as well.
As for your lover's behavior, there are several explanations [besides the fact that he's being very stupid]. If he's very young, he may feel he's invincible and that bad things only happen to other people -- even though, to everyone else, he is "other people." It's possible his "extra-marital" relationships occur when he's under the influence of something, and he's careless. People who are sexually active should carry condoms at all times and be prepared for every circumstance. If your sex partner says he doesn't have a condom, pull one out of your pocket -- pronto. If he doesn't want to use it, say good-night -- no matter how hot he is. Some sexual experiences just aren't worth the danger.
HIV may not be the death sentence that it once was, but people should by no means take it casually. AIDS is still a serious medical condition that can impact a person's entire life. Simply being HIV positive, while nothing to despair over necessarily, can have a serious effect on a person's general health and social status. Too many people, of all races, genders and orientations, mistakenly believe that HIV/AIDS is "no big deal." You have to make sure that your lover is made aware of this by showing him this and other posts on the subject, nagging him until it finally sinks in. Not only is he risking his own health, but yours as well.
You and your partner need to get tested for HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. Again, being HIV positive, even having AIDS, is not the end of the world, as there are treatments that can help patients lead a more or less normal life [although it must be said that not everyone responds to treatment, which is another reason to swear off bare-backing]. But the fact that AIDS may be more treatable than it once was, does not mean that it's nothing to worry about. And other STDs are on the rise.
As for self-hatred, I've no doubt that some people who indulge in risky behavior have serious emotional issues, but in your lover's case it may simply be carefree, foolish recklessness on his part. If drugs or alcohol are influencing his behavior, then those issues must be addressed as well. [Don't get so drunk or fucked up that you can't wear a condom or remember to insist that your sex partner put one on.]
I'm in favor of open relationships. But for them to work, both partners have to be responsible. Which means safe sex at all times -- no exceptions!
Nag your lover about this until it sinks in.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Gay Video Game
Hi Dr. Bill. My name is John and I am a doctoral student at the University of Southern California. My colleagues and I are in the process of developing a video game for gay and bi men about sex and dating, which can be played online for free. The players will go on a series of "virtual" dates and hook-ups with different characters. Your character will even be able to have "virtual sex" on these dates. It's kind of like a "choose your own adventure" game that is designed to be very sexy while also addressing some of the social and health issues facing gay and bi men, including tips on how to find the perfect guy and how to avoid STDs.
Could you help me spread the word? Right now I need to get a few hundred guys to fill out a short anonymous online survey that will help us design the game. The survey is located at:
www.virtualsexproject.com
People who fill out this online survey will automatically be entered into a $200 drawing that will be paid by the university. When the game has been fully produced (next year) we will then need to recruit several thousand guys to play it and provide feedback.
Please let me know if you can do anything to help get the word out. Thanks for your support!!!
John Christensen
Thanks for the information. Sounds very interesting! Okay guys, check it out at the link above. Participate in creating a sexy game and maybe win 200 smackers as well! Go for it!
Could you help me spread the word? Right now I need to get a few hundred guys to fill out a short anonymous online survey that will help us design the game. The survey is located at:
www.virtualsexproject.com
People who fill out this online survey will automatically be entered into a $200 drawing that will be paid by the university. When the game has been fully produced (next year) we will then need to recruit several thousand guys to play it and provide feedback.
Please let me know if you can do anything to help get the word out. Thanks for your support!!!
John Christensen
Thanks for the information. Sounds very interesting! Okay guys, check it out at the link above. Participate in creating a sexy game and maybe win 200 smackers as well! Go for it!
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Casual Sex and "Straight-Acting" Gays?
Is there anything really wrong with anonymous sex, or casual sex, or one-night-stands if you're responsible, stick to safe sex, use condoms and so on? Nowadays it seems as if the only "good" gays are those who want to mimic straights, get married, raise kids, and live in blessed monogamy for the rest of their lives. How dull! What's the point in being gay? Tod.
LOL, maybe you've got a point there. But at the same time it's a little more complicated than that.
First of all, of course there's nothing wrong with casual sex if the parties involved are responsible, use condoms, are tested for STDs regularly (condoms don't prevent everything) etc.
And I, too, have been bothered by the notion that some people won't accept gays unless we all pair up, get married, raise kids, and live in the suburbs in a house with the proverbial white picket fence. We all have to be thuddingly "normal" or else.
As I've said over and over again, we are a very diverse community. Everyone should feel free to live the way they want to live, whether that means lots of anonymous sex or a lifetime partnership -- house, kids, suburbs, neighbors -- be it monogamous or not.
[I confess I've never had the slightest interest in either having or raising children. There is nothing remotely "middle-class" or "suburban" about me. I acknowledge that it's neither fair nor accurate for me to say that picking out houses, furniture, china patterns, and wallpaper for the baby's room are strictly heterosexual activities, but frankly, they'll always seem that way to me. I'm happy being gay. I don't want to be an imitation straight person.]
Two quick points. I do think that some people who indulge only in anonymous sex and never consider the possibility of a relationship should ask themselves why. It doesn't necessarily mean there's anything wrong with them -- some people just aren't into relationships. But in some cases the inability to form a relationship with someone can mean a person is on some level uncomfortable with their orientation. You can be anonymous if you stick to anonymous sex -- but it's harder to be anonymous -- in the closet -- if you have a same-sex lover. Sure, quickies can be a lot of fun and provide much satisfaction on a certain level, but they're not the whole story. Some people who are just into quick sex are avoiding the reality that being gay is more than just about sex.
But be assured that I personally have nothing against one-night-stands. I've never been a particular fan of monogamy either, although I respect those who wish to be monogamous.
But that's a subject for another post.
The second point is that it is in a way ridiculous to suggest that gays who are monogamous are acting straight when we all know that very few straight couples are strictly monogamous. And many of the spouses in so-called straight marriages aren't even straight.
In fact, many a father and husband is -- you guessed it -- out there having anonymous sex with guys like you.
LOL, maybe you've got a point there. But at the same time it's a little more complicated than that.
First of all, of course there's nothing wrong with casual sex if the parties involved are responsible, use condoms, are tested for STDs regularly (condoms don't prevent everything) etc.
And I, too, have been bothered by the notion that some people won't accept gays unless we all pair up, get married, raise kids, and live in the suburbs in a house with the proverbial white picket fence. We all have to be thuddingly "normal" or else.
As I've said over and over again, we are a very diverse community. Everyone should feel free to live the way they want to live, whether that means lots of anonymous sex or a lifetime partnership -- house, kids, suburbs, neighbors -- be it monogamous or not.
[I confess I've never had the slightest interest in either having or raising children. There is nothing remotely "middle-class" or "suburban" about me. I acknowledge that it's neither fair nor accurate for me to say that picking out houses, furniture, china patterns, and wallpaper for the baby's room are strictly heterosexual activities, but frankly, they'll always seem that way to me. I'm happy being gay. I don't want to be an imitation straight person.]
Two quick points. I do think that some people who indulge only in anonymous sex and never consider the possibility of a relationship should ask themselves why. It doesn't necessarily mean there's anything wrong with them -- some people just aren't into relationships. But in some cases the inability to form a relationship with someone can mean a person is on some level uncomfortable with their orientation. You can be anonymous if you stick to anonymous sex -- but it's harder to be anonymous -- in the closet -- if you have a same-sex lover. Sure, quickies can be a lot of fun and provide much satisfaction on a certain level, but they're not the whole story. Some people who are just into quick sex are avoiding the reality that being gay is more than just about sex.
But be assured that I personally have nothing against one-night-stands. I've never been a particular fan of monogamy either, although I respect those who wish to be monogamous.
But that's a subject for another post.
The second point is that it is in a way ridiculous to suggest that gays who are monogamous are acting straight when we all know that very few straight couples are strictly monogamous. And many of the spouses in so-called straight marriages aren't even straight.
In fact, many a father and husband is -- you guessed it -- out there having anonymous sex with guys like you.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Bars vs. Online Dating
You've written about being careful about who you meet online. But don't you have to be even more careful in bars, especially if you're drinking? At least online you have a clear head. Anon.
Well, maybe you do. A picture of a hot guy or a massive member attached to a private message on a gay dating site can make some men take any risk. There are some things you can do to protect yourself from bad scenes if you meet someone in a bar:
1.) Don't get so crap-faced that you don't know what you're doing or who you're doing it with.
2.) Carry plenty of condoms. Most bars have jars full of them, or ask the bartender.
3.) If someone seems too good to be true -- they're definitely way out of your league -- maybe they have less than pleasant motives for wanting to get together.
4.) Ask the other customers, preferably regulars, as well as the bartender, if they know the guy you're planning to go off with. Is he a complete stranger to everyone? Is he well-known as a nice guy in the bar?
5.) If you go off with a stranger, make sure you introduce him to a few people, and that he knows that they know who you're going off with.
6.) If someone is sending out bad signals, listen to your brain and don't go with him.
7.) Don't bring a complete stranger that no one can vouch for to your home. Bringing them to your hotel room is also a bad idea. If you want to go home with someone, stay out of private houses in isolated areas until you know them better. Going to somebody else's hotel room is generally safer.
8.) Sick to safe sex! Many guys do not know their HIV status, lie about it, or do not volunteer the information. But if you stick to safe sex, that won't be a problem.
The advantage that bars have over online dating is that at least you're meeting the guy face to face and you can immediately tell if the chemistry is there (unless it's more a question of alcohol-induced lust). If you're not drunk you can size the person up. You're seeing what they really look like and not a possibly doctored or older photograph.
Remember, play safe and have a great time.
Well, maybe you do. A picture of a hot guy or a massive member attached to a private message on a gay dating site can make some men take any risk. There are some things you can do to protect yourself from bad scenes if you meet someone in a bar:
1.) Don't get so crap-faced that you don't know what you're doing or who you're doing it with.
2.) Carry plenty of condoms. Most bars have jars full of them, or ask the bartender.
3.) If someone seems too good to be true -- they're definitely way out of your league -- maybe they have less than pleasant motives for wanting to get together.
4.) Ask the other customers, preferably regulars, as well as the bartender, if they know the guy you're planning to go off with. Is he a complete stranger to everyone? Is he well-known as a nice guy in the bar?
5.) If you go off with a stranger, make sure you introduce him to a few people, and that he knows that they know who you're going off with.
6.) If someone is sending out bad signals, listen to your brain and don't go with him.
7.) Don't bring a complete stranger that no one can vouch for to your home. Bringing them to your hotel room is also a bad idea. If you want to go home with someone, stay out of private houses in isolated areas until you know them better. Going to somebody else's hotel room is generally safer.
8.) Sick to safe sex! Many guys do not know their HIV status, lie about it, or do not volunteer the information. But if you stick to safe sex, that won't be a problem.
The advantage that bars have over online dating is that at least you're meeting the guy face to face and you can immediately tell if the chemistry is there (unless it's more a question of alcohol-induced lust). If you're not drunk you can size the person up. You're seeing what they really look like and not a possibly doctored or older photograph.
Remember, play safe and have a great time.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Tops or Bottoms?
What percentage of gay men are tops and what percentage are bottoms? Anon.
I have never, ahem, actually done a scientific survey on this subject, but I would say it's about evenly divided. Of course there are men who are versatile, both top and bottom, but judging from what I see on gay dating/sex/friendship sites, there don't seem to be as many of them.
I can tell you that in my experience you can't assume the butcher gay men are automatically tops and the "femmes" are bottoms, because sometimes the reverse is true. When two men get together, it's two men getting together -- neither one is the "lady." Men who are bottoms should never feel that they are somehow less male because of it. There are some men who think of themselves as being "straight" because they are always the top when they have sex with another guy -- they're fooling themselves.
And, as usual, I remind everyone to stick to safe sex. This is true even if you are a top. Although there have been fewer cases of HIV infection in men who are tops than bottoms, it does happen. When it comes to anal penetration, always wear a condom.
I have never, ahem, actually done a scientific survey on this subject, but I would say it's about evenly divided. Of course there are men who are versatile, both top and bottom, but judging from what I see on gay dating/sex/friendship sites, there don't seem to be as many of them.
I can tell you that in my experience you can't assume the butcher gay men are automatically tops and the "femmes" are bottoms, because sometimes the reverse is true. When two men get together, it's two men getting together -- neither one is the "lady." Men who are bottoms should never feel that they are somehow less male because of it. There are some men who think of themselves as being "straight" because they are always the top when they have sex with another guy -- they're fooling themselves.
And, as usual, I remind everyone to stick to safe sex. This is true even if you are a top. Although there have been fewer cases of HIV infection in men who are tops than bottoms, it does happen. When it comes to anal penetration, always wear a condom.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Mature Action
I'm a fifty-four-year-old gay man who thought that all the fun was behind him, but I've put myself out there -- on line and in bars -- and am having more sex today than I did twenty years ago. My God -- I get laid practically every time I go out, and I can't believe how many men contact me on gay dating sites for older men. Even guys twenty years younger! I'm not so special but apparently there's someone for everyone. I try to play safe at all times, of course. I'm just here to say that there definitely is gay life for those of us who are fifty and beyond. Brian
Brian, I'm not sure if you're asking a question or just bragging, you little devil, LOL. Seriously, you've hit the nail on the head. Of course there's more to "gay life" than sex, but sex is certainly a big part of it. Good for you! I think younger people might be less depressed about getting older if they knew that the, ahem, joys of life continue even in middle and senior years, and this is true for straights as well as gays. As for "trying to play safe," don't just try -- do it! HIV and other SDT infection is rising in men above the age of 50, the downside of all that action. But that's no reason to take alarm. Use condoms (even if you're a top), shower within thirty minutes after sex, avoid risky behavior, get yourself tested regularly, and it's not a bad idea to get to know a potential sex partner first and find out about his sexual history if you can. You can be safe and have a great time as well! I'm looking forward to my fifties, which are rapidly approaching. Way to go, guy!
Brian, I'm not sure if you're asking a question or just bragging, you little devil, LOL. Seriously, you've hit the nail on the head. Of course there's more to "gay life" than sex, but sex is certainly a big part of it. Good for you! I think younger people might be less depressed about getting older if they knew that the, ahem, joys of life continue even in middle and senior years, and this is true for straights as well as gays. As for "trying to play safe," don't just try -- do it! HIV and other SDT infection is rising in men above the age of 50, the downside of all that action. But that's no reason to take alarm. Use condoms (even if you're a top), shower within thirty minutes after sex, avoid risky behavior, get yourself tested regularly, and it's not a bad idea to get to know a potential sex partner first and find out about his sexual history if you can. You can be safe and have a great time as well! I'm looking forward to my fifties, which are rapidly approaching. Way to go, guy!
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Unsafe Sex
I'm gay but I can't understand why there are guys who take it up the ass without a condom, who even get ticked off if the top wants to use one? What's up with that? I would never have anal sex without a condom. Jerry.
To put it bluntly, they're nuts -- and so are you if you don't use a condom (glad to hear that you do). Guys like that are playing with fire; even if their sex partners say they're HIV negative doesn't mean they are, or that they've even been tested. I assume these guys have a crazy love of danger, think they're somehow immune to HIV or bad luck, have some kind of death wish, or thrive on taking nutty chances. Some will simply say that it feels better without a condom. Maybe (I'm a top man myself)? But even if the sensation is a bit muted isn't it better if it's safe?
These guys not only don't care about themselves, they don't care about you. Yes, you can contract HIV even if you are a top and have sex with a bottom. If you indulge in anal sex, always use a condom.
Why do these guys take such unnecessary risks (and there are straight guys like this as well as gay guys)? I guess it's all about the thrill, immediate gratification without responsibility. Or sheer stupidity? Younger gay guys did not grow up with dozens of their friends horribly wasting away and dying from AIDS. Older guys figure most of their life is over already, so who cares? They all think that if you contract HIV all you have to do is take a pill. HIV may no longer be a death sentence for most, but there are still serious social, sexual and health complications, and there are quite a few people who do not respond to medications. HIV infection is still a serious matter.
Avoid guys like this. At the very least insist on safe sex and condoms when you''re with them or just walk out the door.
There are plenty of more responsible guys in the gay community.
To put it bluntly, they're nuts -- and so are you if you don't use a condom (glad to hear that you do). Guys like that are playing with fire; even if their sex partners say they're HIV negative doesn't mean they are, or that they've even been tested. I assume these guys have a crazy love of danger, think they're somehow immune to HIV or bad luck, have some kind of death wish, or thrive on taking nutty chances. Some will simply say that it feels better without a condom. Maybe (I'm a top man myself)? But even if the sensation is a bit muted isn't it better if it's safe?
These guys not only don't care about themselves, they don't care about you. Yes, you can contract HIV even if you are a top and have sex with a bottom. If you indulge in anal sex, always use a condom.
Why do these guys take such unnecessary risks (and there are straight guys like this as well as gay guys)? I guess it's all about the thrill, immediate gratification without responsibility. Or sheer stupidity? Younger gay guys did not grow up with dozens of their friends horribly wasting away and dying from AIDS. Older guys figure most of their life is over already, so who cares? They all think that if you contract HIV all you have to do is take a pill. HIV may no longer be a death sentence for most, but there are still serious social, sexual and health complications, and there are quite a few people who do not respond to medications. HIV infection is still a serious matter.
Avoid guys like this. At the very least insist on safe sex and condoms when you''re with them or just walk out the door.
There are plenty of more responsible guys in the gay community.
Monday, January 7, 2008
Cruising Roommates
I recently spent a very nice night with a man who has a roommate -- not a lover. I run into the roommate in the bars a lot and we find each other attractive, too. My question is -- is it bad form, tacky, for me to go home with a trick's roommate, especially as it's only been a week or so. How long should I wait? Or should I just stick to the first guy? B in Boston.
That depends. Was this a one-night-stand or is the first guy someone you want to keep seeing? If that's the case, then "dating" -- or sleeping with -- his roommate may not be the best idea. It may be fun to have two guys competing for your favors, but it won't be fun for them and, ultimately, it won't be much fun for you, either.
Are you certain these two are only "roommates?" Sometimes guys have a kind of loose, open relationship, but it's still a relationship. I assume they have separate bedrooms. Since the first guy didn't ask the roommate to hop in for a threesome, he really may not like you dating the other guy.
One thing I suggest is that you ask the other guy exactly what's going on, and if he feels sleeping with you would cause problems with his roommate. You can always wait until the first guy is out of town.
By the way, has the second guy actually asked you home yet? You may be attracted to each other but that doesn't mean he plans to poach on his roommate's preserve.
And as always, baby -- stick to safe sex!
That depends. Was this a one-night-stand or is the first guy someone you want to keep seeing? If that's the case, then "dating" -- or sleeping with -- his roommate may not be the best idea. It may be fun to have two guys competing for your favors, but it won't be fun for them and, ultimately, it won't be much fun for you, either.
Are you certain these two are only "roommates?" Sometimes guys have a kind of loose, open relationship, but it's still a relationship. I assume they have separate bedrooms. Since the first guy didn't ask the roommate to hop in for a threesome, he really may not like you dating the other guy.
One thing I suggest is that you ask the other guy exactly what's going on, and if he feels sleeping with you would cause problems with his roommate. You can always wait until the first guy is out of town.
By the way, has the second guy actually asked you home yet? You may be attracted to each other but that doesn't mean he plans to poach on his roommate's preserve.
And as always, baby -- stick to safe sex!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)